I want my son to grow up to be just like his father: kind, loving, patient, and most of all respectful towards women.
I started dating at a very early age-earlier than I should have been. Every boyfriend that I had ever had-except for my husband-treated me with disrespect. I was an object, nothing more. I am not sure why I stayed, but I began believing that this was simply the norm.. until I met my husband. I then had the courage to get out of the marriage that I was in and put myself first-for once in my entire life.
This is what I want my son to know about women:
1. Women need love. Women can come off as clingy. It is just the way that God made us. We need love, while men typically need touch. This is why men and women compliment each other, in nature. However, most men often confuse this desire for affection as "needy" or even "annoying." I want my son to understand this nature of women and to respect their needs.
2. Women are not sexual objects. The first time I lost my virginity, it was to my boyfriend of 3 years. Am I happy about it now? Nope. Especially since I was pressured into it at such a young age. At one point, I told him I did not want to continue and that I wanted to wait. He pretty much said that he's a guy and I needed to meet his needs and if I didn't, he would leave. What a jerk, right? Well, being 15 years old (gasp!), I was young, naive, and well stupid. But hey hindsight is 20/20 and always will be. I want to teach my son to respect a woman's body as her own. If she does not want to be touched, I want him to honor that. If she wants to wait, I want him to take that as an amazing thing and wait with her.
3. Women are emotional creatures. By emotional, I mean boderline bi-polar. Just kidding, but seriously! One minute we can be overly excited and the next, we can be fuming pissed or even sad. It is partially hormones and the rest is just our DNA. I want my son to respect women's feelings and understand that sometimes we might just come off crazy, but women mean well.
Today, it seems that many men do not know how to respect a women. Of course, I want to raise a gentlemen, but I don't want to just tell him to do things without explaining why.
If I have a daughter, there will be things that I want her to know about men. I don't want to sugar coat things to my children. As they grow, they will learn. Sometimes, they will learn even earlier than we had hoped.
My only wishes for my son:
- to be happy with his life and choices and to have zerp regrets
- to have a family that serves him well
- to be a servant unto others